Often times, in the forums, the ladies(myself included) can get frustrated with women who are upset that they are not pregnant after a few months. One of us ladies always post “It can take up to 12 months for perfectly healthy couples, with no fertility issues, to conceive.” And that is completely correct.

This morning I read a post and my heart broke. I remembered being three months into this process and feeling doomed. Like everyone could get pregnant but me. I remember seeing so many babies at church on Sunday, I felt like crying. Three month into this mess.

And what I realized is, besides these past 7 months, the first four or five were absolutely miserable. When you start trying, you think it’s going to happen instantly. That’s what we’re taught. Unprotected sex = pregnancy. So when month two, or three, or four come, you think something is wrong.

It took me that long to educate myself enough on the process of getting pregnant.

But I can vividly remember being in that moment and thinking something was wrong. (Turns out I was right, but im the exception not the rule.)


7 thoughts on “Hardest

  1. I agree! I too assumed I’d be pregnant within 2-3 months of unprotected sex, even though I had read the “it can take up to 12 months for a perfectly healthy couple to conceive”….I just thought, well that doesn’t apply to me! Boy was I wrong!

    1. I feel like there should be a training or something every woman has when she’s out of high school that explains generally speaking, it isn’t a one month thing.

      1. Yea really! There’s all this talk on prevention….but no talk on what to do if you’re not preventing but nothings happening!!

  2. I was in a forum a long time (I didn’t like it and left) — and now I’m in Two Week Wait, which I think you are too. Anyway, this lady comes on this old forum and expressed frustration about how she had been trying for a year to get pregnant with her third child. Her third. I seriously thought she was going to be lynched. I guess the point is that some people jump on these forums when they already have kids or when they’ve only been trying a month or two (naturally) and don’t get how difficult it is for the rest of us to hear that.

    1. I think secondary infertility is a difficult thing, and you know I’ll probably end up with that too. I just don’t think the path to motherhood is going to be an easy one for me. Ugh! Just sign me up, infertility, secondary infertility, tertiary infertitlity, etc…UGH!

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