My mom is Calvin’s Sparkle ❇. And she kept many toys and treasures from my childhood. My dad, Calvin’s poppy, built a crib that they used for all five of us. And when Sparkle was keeping Calvin while I was at work, I brought over an pack n play, but Poppy had setup the crib.
Well Sparkle ❇ busted out the little people this weekend. She cleaned them all, and I am so excited. See Fisher Price still makes little people, but they’re terrible. We have a whole city, parking garage, strip mall, tree house, its amazing.
I am so excited for Calvin to be able to play with these one day.
we have been doing cry it out for six days. It has taken a bit of figuring out what it would look like for us. Initially, i thought we would do the extinction method(he cries, no intervention.) we were having crying lasting 30-60 minutes and it was heart wrenching. So I stopped that. Now, when hes been up 1.5-2 hours(75 minutes first thing in the morning) I sing him his lullaby, put on his hippo cloud b star projector, and put him in crib awake (drowsy doesn’t work for Calvin.) he has a paci, and several more throughout his bed. I then leave and wait and watch. I let him fuss and cry and when his hands go up and he starts rubbing his eyes, I’ll go in and replace his paci if he needs it, and he’ll drift off. This morning he babbled(no fussing) for 8 minutes, he started rubbing his eyes, I went in replace the paci, and left. By the time I was back in the living room and looking at the monitor, he was asleep.
now, our naps aren’t long, and we aren’t super rigid BC we still have to do life. Sunday he took his first nap at home in his crib, and the other two he was in the tula for. Then Tuesday he napped in the church nursery during my bible study(meaning it could have been in a swing, in someone’s arms, a rock n play.) and yesterday I was super exhausted and wanted to nap, so I pulled C into bed with me for his afternoon nap. He’ll sleep for 20-40 minutes in his crib, but in my bed cuddled up with me, he slept for an hour and forty five minutes.
I’m not sure how to extend naps, but we’ll wait til after vacation to deal with them.
So ultimately, CIO has worked for us, but we have adjusted out methods to better suit Calvin’s needs.
this is day four of cry it out. The first nap we cried it our for he cried for 57 minutes, then I got him up. It’s difficult BC we aren’t shutting down our life completely, BC that isn’t feasible for us, and I do want to have Calvin be a bit flexible. Yesterday he took tula or car naps as we had to be out all day. We currently let him fuss/cry for thirty minutes the most. We kind of use our judgment here. Sometimes after ten or so, we can tell he’s trying to fall asleep but can’t BC he doesn’t have a pack, so we’ll go in and pop a paci in. He usually goes to sleep after that. The longest we go is 30 minutes, after that we go and paci him no matter what.
its tricky BC Calvin can out a paci in his mouth, but he can find them in the crib(and I’ve put about six in there.) occasionally he’ll happen upon one, and get it in, but it isn’t frequent enough that we can depend on it.
Bedtime he fussed maybe 10 minutes. First morning nap, has been anywhere from 3-15(after the first day) the other sometimes take 20-30 minutes.
his naps are still max 45 minutes, a d I wanted to ask some mommies out there, how long do your babies sleep at night? Calvin will sleep from 7-7, and I’m troubleshooting the short nap, and pretty much the only thing I can come up with is he’s getting too much night time sleep. Maybe he should only BC getting 10 hours? In which case, Joseph and I need to decide what is important to us, having adult time in the evening? Or breaks throughout the day.
currently our schedule is
7(ish, sometimes is 645) wake up and eat
745(ish sometimes 815) down for first nap.
9ish up from nap
10 ish eat
1130-1230 second nap
230 third nap
7 down for bed
today we start crying it out. We are doing the extinction method, save me any lectures/opinions. This has been the hardest decision I’ve had to make so far. Mainly BC of these “studies” that say crying it out damages brain cells. Well after extensive research, those studies are correct. Crying for extensive periods of time(ie neglected not twenty minutes in my own bed with my lovey and pacifier) can raise cortisol levels, which can damage brain cells. But Calvin isn’t neglected. There are studies show the starting daycare can raise coritsol levels in babies and toddlers. Cortisol levels are raised with immunizations, doctors visits, being watched by a babysitter. Cortisol levels are triggered by stressful situations. Babies and children will go through many stressful situations, every stressful situation does not damage brain cells. If a child is left to CIO for days with needs unmet. That is not the CIO we are doing.
We came to the decision to CIO after months of shot naps, but even on top of that, we have never rocked or nursed to sleep. We don’t use and sleep props, but Calvin has been taking consistently longer to fall asleep. Yesterday I put him in his crib drowsy, and worked with patting his back, rubbing his face, and other methods of soothing for 40 minutes, where he screamed the whole time. He swats my hands away, he is frustrated with me trying to help him sleep. So we are hoping he will learn to sleep. Today is the beginning, hopefully we are successful, and soon.
so I have done two work out of the days in cross fit now. I took today off BC I hurt. I am not exaggerating here. But the amount of abdominal pain and soreness I have is comparable to post c-section. Except now my butt, legs, chest, and arms are sore as well. My house is a mess BC I can barely get out of bed, let alone bend down and clean. Just goes to show how little abdominal strength I have now. Maybe the mom bod isn’t so bad?
So right before we got pregnant I had started cross fit, I hadn’t done it long enough to see any results, but I really enjoyed it. So today I started back( it was supposed to be last week, but instead I shifted Calvins wake up time to be 7 last week so I’m home in time to nurse and Joe doesn’t have to worry about getting ready for work while he’s home along caring for Calvin.) truthfully I almost bailed this morning. I couldn’t fall asleep after the dreamfeed last night, so I was up until 1130, then I woke at three genuinely not feeling well, and then I have to wake up at 430 in order to pump before making it to the gym. And really what kept me from turning on my alarm and going back to sleep wasn’t the three friend who I told id be there this morning, it was the fact that I set our coffee pot to brew a pot at 425, so by the time my alarm went off at 430, the coffee was already made. So I went. I had to cut the workout in half, mainly so id be able to function enough to come back tomorrow😉 but i am SORE! And its lovely. I go on vacation in three weeks to the beach, and realistically I know getting my body to where id like it is going to take time, but even just working out makes me feel more confident. I am excited that at least for the next six months or so I will be able to focus on working out. Last time I was into cross fit, I had to stop on two different occasions BC we were doing medicated cycles, and both times my RE wanted me to take it easy BC of the number of follicles/size of my ovaries, then in the tww with our iui(where I was actually pregnant) alot of what I read said not to let you body over heat, so i stopped then as well. But since we aren’t trying for another six months or so, it’ll be nice to just be able to work out. The gym did up ita membership cost, likely BC they changed locations and it is much nicer. I was $55/mont. Now its $75/month, but they give a 10% discount to teachers, so it’ll be $67.50. But in order to get my monies worth I am going to have to go m-f, and the occasional Saturday.
speaking of the mom bod. I did manage to find a bikini I feel good in. It is a high waisted bikini, and a nice top with good coverage and support. The top was super difficult and I probably spent about six hours total trying to find one. The issue is, my breasts are large. I went to Victoria secret, and tried on a 36d and dd, and ddd and spilled out of all of them. Size wise, in pants in a 8/10 right now(hoping to get to a 6/8) but I had to get a plus size bikini top from target Ava and Viv line. I ended up with 16 or 18(with the band tightened) and they are great. They just provide a bit more coverage than anything I had been able to find. So here is me rocking my mom bod. I’m smooshier than id like to be, but I feel good in this, and don’t think it is too off putting to bystanders.
and here is my adorable baby boy in the pool, clearly he loves it!
I have always wanted to be a sahm, I am so thankful that Joseph and I are able to give that to our children. And I’m so excited to start! This summer we are doing a bible study at church, and a new mommies group at a local baby store. This fall we will likely continue both, and we may add in swimming lessons, I’ve got see how they are before committing.
my mom was a sahm and is still at home even though her baby just graduate college. My MIL is the same way. Both of them kindly informed me that now that I’m at home, my homemaker skills have got to improve. I know this sounds a bit sexist, but truthfully, I cook,and make messes. All that I really need to do is clean up behind me right now.
I was talking to my MIL about this and she said she always loved cleaning, and I love sewing which is almost the exact opposite of cleaning. I think I’m going to set up a nice play area in our unfinished basement and set up my sewing things down there so I can make a mess and work on projects regularly, but it isn’t part of the main house, so I can leave it messy for a while during projects.
any tips to help keep thing clean?
we have started to let Calvin fuss-it-out. If he gets to screaming crying we go in and offer comfort/paci. We realized if we rush in an plug the boy with his Pac, his frustration grows, its almost like he’s gotta burn off some of his extra energy through his fussing. We have definitely learned his mantra cry, its a wehoh wehoh wehoh, ill try and post a video of it soon.
With fussing it out he usually enters into his mantra cry phase within 3-5 minutes and may mantra cry for another 10-15, it isn’t usually that long unless we missed his window of sleepiness.
When we out him down, we hold him, sing our song, then put him down. For comfort, Calvin likes to feel skin to skin contact. So he doesn’t like the hand on his chest, of patting the back, he wants our hand cupping his face. He’ll snuggle into it and calm way down. Occasionally, he’ll get super worked up, and then we have to do squats with him until calm.
today in trying to really focus on naps and figure out what his optimal awake time is.