Category Archives: self preservation

Self preservation

Is my new thing. Don’t come to me with an accidental pregnancy and expect anything but self preservation from me. Don’t tell me you don’t know how to feel about your pregnancy bc the timing wasn’t what you had planned. Don’t act like I am young and have all the time in the world, bc apparently it takes me a year a half to conceive, tack on another 9 months of gestation, and we are up to 27 months. That timing can make the next ten years of my fertility fly.

I have some people in my life, who are also on Victoria preservation. Trying to keep my emotional stimulus down to a minimal. Suggestions that don’t work:

1. Don’t hang out with people who have children or are pregnant, or who talk about pregnancy/babies.
Why this doesn’t work: let’s start with family, On Joseph’s side, we are getting ready to welcome a new nephew in the next few weeks. So that would mean I’m skipping every holiday or get together. My side, R & B are expecting a daughter early January, so I’m skipping every holiday or get together with my family as well. Local friends, Yep, that’s a big goose egg or friends I have who don’t have babies, or arent pregnant locally. If we can branch out say 1100 miles, that ups my non pregnant / no babies friends to 2 (but I’m praying that number goes down to one so quickly!!) so as you can see, avoidance of all triggers is not an option.

2. Come up with a hobby.
Why this doesn’t work: I have a hobby, it’s sewing/embroidering. I’m pretty good at. This hobby is starting to make me money, but guess what markets I make money in. Babies and sororities.

There are several other suggestions that I’m not going to post about because they are similar to “relax, it’ll happen.”

What does work: Clinging to Gods promise of one day perfect life with Him and seeing our sweet baby we lost. Staying faithful to Gods plan for our family. Taking refuge in my marriage, truly, Joseph is my protector.