Raise your hand if you want to poas.

Both mine are in the air. 7dpo. I had some INTENSE pain today after our Easter brunch, and feeling a little crampy. And I want to pee on so many sticks. I don’t have any. I’m going to buy two three packs of FRER tomorrow after work. I’ll pee on Tuesday morning 9dpo. I know that’s early, but I just feel like this has been our best chance yet, so I’m cautiously hopeful.

Pessimistically hopeful.

That is me. Or optimistically doubtful. Either way, most of me is thinking this month is a no, but this tiny inkling of hope is hoping it’s a yes. Only time will tell. And I’m evenly split between wanting time to hurry, dreading when it gets here. I pee’d on an OPK this morning, the second line was faint. I’m guessing my trigger is out of my system.

4 days left til testing.

Surviving the tww.

I’ve been trying my best to stay super busy in my tww. I’m 6dpo today. Yesterday I had a mini cave and peed in an opk. I still have plenty of trigger left in me. Other than that, I’ve been knitting like crazy. I have one stocking done, my nieces is 70% finished, and two I need to start. I’m also trying to finish Christmas gifts, which I’m hoping to do tonight.

I am also hosting a Christmas party in 6 days so my house needs to be super cleaned, and I want to rearrange our living room. So, I have a really busy 8 days ahead of me,which is perfect!

Christmas bf?

So I ovulated yesterday. It wasn’t super painful, but I could definitely feel it(where usually I can’t.) so naturally I wake up this morning and think about when to test. My RE told me to test on Christmas.

I triggered Monday, which makes all hpt positive. I believe last time the trigger was gone around 9dpo. Which would be Friday December 20th.

My concern is if I test before or on Christmas and its a bfn, it would ruin Christmas. But if its going to be a bfp, I want to know ASAP! I should probably have a smidgen of self preservation and wait til the 26th. Oh well, I have 13 days to figure it out.

Why can’t I…

just be fertile?

be one of those women who can test at like 8dpo and get a bfp nobody can question?

not feel super out every time I pee on a stick?

Rainbows

Yesterday I saw two rainbows on my way home from church. Today I saw a rainbow on my way to meet Joseph and grocery shop.

Here’s hoping I get a rainbow baby this cycle. Tested out the trigger today 9dpo. I may not test tomorrow, or I may.

Feeling hopeful, but also getting nervous that I’ll be crushed this cycle.

So I’m a crazy.

I had two baby showers this weekend. I loved seeing my friends today at the baby shower, but they started talking about how crazy it is that meth addicts have babies, or one lady works at a hospital and she said after giving birth she went out to smoke pot in the parking lot. And all I could think was those ladies get babies and I don’t . actually, that frowny face isn’t quite large enough. But whatever. So. this morning I posted a picture of my peesticks. Then I actually played around with them in gimp. and…<DON’T JUDGE ME!!!> normally I’m not one for intense tweaking. Just inverting and such, but I played with the “thresholds” tool, which it starts off completely white and as you slide it over it start putting in black the darkest colors. so I slid it over, all the control lines showed up first, then the top test line, then third test line, then second, and fourth, then fifth, then…seventh, then sixth! WHAT WHAT?!?! I know it doesn’t mean anything yet, but maybe tomorrows will be darker? Here is the untweaked pic again.

And tweaked:See how the test inbetween hasn’t even showed up? Maybe maybe?

\Testing out the trigger

So yesterday was crazy, as I was at a baby shower from 2-8:30. So I wasn’t able to post a picture. But todays picture has Saturdays (6dpo) and today’s (7dpo)

So yesterday and todays are BARELY there. But is todays lighter or the same? Maybe even darker?! I starting to get my hopes up. Both were taken with first morning urine. AND…I think I maybe actually 8dpo. Here me out.

36 hours after my trigger was 8am Sunday Morning. So 1 dpo was from 8am Sunday-Monday. 2dpo Monday-Tuesday, 3dpo Tuesday-Wednesday, 4dpo Wednesday-Thursday, 5dpo Thursday-Friday, 6dpo-Friday to Saturday, 7dpo Saturday-Sunday, and now(and for the peestick which was done at 8:30 am Sunday morning) I’m 8dpo. The only reason I’m figuring all this out, is for implantation purposes. According to whenmybaby.com, when I plug in my information, I get this.

So if in fact today I am 8dpo, I have already had an 8% chance of implantation. If I haven’t implanted, there is a great chance I will in the next three days. So, if this trigger shot doesn’t go away completely, but instead starts getting darker, I’M GOING TO FLIP! In the best way possible.

I have another baby shower today. So yay for that.

Testing out the Trigger.

Super faint, but still there. 5dpo, 7dpt.

Testing out the trigger 4 dpo

I’m 4 dpo, 6 dpt.

Still there but much fainter. Hopefully it’ll be out by Sunday, then the real testing can start.

I also wanted to share this funny picture. Every now and then on pinterest something will line up just perfectly. Haha.

Tonight I have snacks for our small group. So today I mixed up two different types of cookies. Plain ole sugar cookies, and a low carb Best Christmas Cookies. I didn’t roll them in pecans very well. In fact, I basically set them in pecans, so only one side of the cookies have the pecans on them, but they’re still super yummy. I also made a sugar cookie glaze. 

I volunteered my younger sister to make cookies for our brothers fiancé’s shower on Saturday. Its monster themed, so I looked EVERYWHERE for a monster cookie cutter, but couldn’t find any reasonably priced for sale, so I made my own out of a foil pan. I found a tutorial through pinterest. The finished cookie is below. But today I practiced making the glaze, we’ll make it in all different colors, then we’re going to add these little premade monster eye candies and they’ll be monster cookies. Hopefully.